Huzzah!

I have a new follower apparently. For those of you (other two who occasionally read my posts) who haven't read the comments from the Anonymous poster, please do so. I am sure you will delight in them as much as I do. I am honestly not sure if this person loves God, hates God, loves me, or loathes me. Nonetheless, I will continue to pontificate whenever the mood so strikes. I obviously don't check in here very often as evidenced by the recent discovery of the Anonymous poster. You know, any press is good press, though, right? So, my following has increased by 50%! That's amazing! I am frankly delighted and consider it a wild success. Huzzah, indeed!

Bah Humbug

I went cross country skiing yesterday. I know - riveting. Well, luckily it isn't the point of this blog, but I'm getting there. After a day of skiing in the sunny but cold day, I arrived home and took a scorching hot shower that lasted long enough to make environmental advocates visibly cringe. Once out of the blessed bathing stall, I became quite sleepy. Yet, it was only 6 pm. I struggled to keep my eyes open and wanted nothing more than the comfort of my bed and the blinding darkness of my room. But, it was only 6. I vowed to remain awake until 9 and ventured to my neighbor's house in the hopes that her company would keep me alert until the pre-determined bed time. My neighbor has TV, which is novel as I do not, so it often proves a useful distraction. Such is the case in this story. She promptly flipped to "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" or whatever the official name is. I was delighted as it is a favorite from childhood, but this was the version portraying real people dressed up like freaks that would never truly exist. The one with Jim Carrey. Inwardly reminding myself that beggars cannot be choosers, I sat quietly and let the TV erode more of my mind while seducing me into watching more. Whilst viewing this movie, I came to an important realization. An epiphany if you will. I found myself saying things like "Here, here, Brutha" when the grinch was at his most nasty and hateful, and I realized that I just might be a grinch myself. It is widely known amongst my friends that I hate Christmas (please review the "list of things I suck at" which was recently amended), or at least what it has become. But my feelings of comaraderie with the grinch didn't stop there, oh no. My concern grew when I realized that it was the grinch's general disdain for human-kind to which I truly related. I honestly enjoyed watching him ruin the Christmas festivities for the Whoville residents (who I generally viewed as idiots, half-wits, and losers) and felt that the grinch was "telling it like it is." I mean, honestly, what the hell is wrong with me??? Has it really come to this? The creature I most relate to is an outcast full of malice and hostility who isolates himself in a remote and isolated location? I'm sad to report that it has truly given me pause. And if I find that it is the case, is it a bad thing? Would I really want it any differently.

Merry Fucking Christmas...

In the Nick of Time

This year almost managed to slip by without ONE solitary post. Perish the thought. I readily acknowledge that nobody is still checking this thing. I mean, obviously I cannot commit to doing anything consistently. And besides that, I don't have much to write about. This is more of a platform for my occasional need to pontificate in writing about any number of things in my head. Trick is catching one and holding on long enough to wrestle with it.

I have a new holiday tradition. Because the most recent holiday was Thanksgiving, I should probably specify that I am referring to Halloween, the most sacred of holidays. This tradition began last year with a trip to the grocery store to obtain night time medication to help me sleep as I had a terrible cold that kept me from sleeping. As I prepared to enter the store, a homeless man sitting cold and forgotten on the sidewalk just outside of the entrance asked in a hopeful, but somewhat dejected tone, "Hey - will you buy me a sandwich?" Surprised that he was asking for food rather than money, I said, "Sure. What kind of sandwich would you like?" The homeless man gave this great consideration before responding, "Roast Beef." I offered to buy some side dishes, a beverage, and dessert and warned, "You better be here when I come out. I don't eat meat, so I won't eat this sandwich." He assured me he would be there. A few moments later, I exited the store. As promised, the man was waiting. I gave him the food and chatted with him briefly before heading home (and realizing I forgot the cold medicine). I felt so much better about purchasing dinner for this man than I would have felt buying candy for children who go around terrorizing people and expecting candy in return. This year, I went to the store for the same reason on Halloween weekend (apparently that is becoming a bit of a tradition as well) and ended up buying dinner for another homeless man. It kind of made my day. I hope that the economy continues to struggle as it provides no shortage of homeless people for whom I can purchase food one day each year.

Twice In One Year?

By now, I figure I am posting mainly for myself. Surely nobody who expressed interest in this lackluster, infrequently posted-upon blog has continued to follow it. If so, I am deeply sorry. If you checked in as often as I do, you could go over the sparse offerings already posted or check my various lists. I haven't changed them, but when you only read them twice a year, they seem new and funny all over again (assuming they were in the first place). And by the way, when you do look at my lists, I urge you to notice that "blogging" is the thing I most suck at - you've been warned. My previous promise to be more diligent about my posting was obviously an outright lie as anyone who HAS bothered to check back will have figured out by now. I'm clearly unreliable. Or is it that I now have a life? No - it's probably a poor reflection on me as a human being. At any rate, here I am posting again after ONLY 8 months! It's a rousing success for me and I require kudos and praise (so entertain me back by posting, damn you). I recently travelled to another state, which I regularly do. However, this particular trip required air travel and consequently accompanied by an epiphany. I always claim to love travelling, but I realized that what I love is the destination. The actual travelling I could do without (screaming babies, grossly overweight seat neighbors and all). All of which flies in the face of one of my fundamental beliefs - it's not about the destination, it's about the journey. If that's the case, I don't care to travel at all. The journey frankly sucks. If that's the GOOD part? I'll pass.

For the Love of God

This week, I have been assaulted by religious emails from various sources. My favorite one decries a movie theoretically to be released this summer. It is called "Corpus Christi" which, according to the very informative email, portrays Jesus (I prefer to call him "Jeebs" because we're BFFs like that, Jeebs and I) and his disciples as homosexuals. Of course, we all know that God (and, I feel it is safe to assume, his beloved offspring Jeebs) loves everyone except the homos. I guess he must have sent out a mass email about the excepting of homosexuals in the "I love all my children equally" clause that I did not receive. Anyway, apparently they just aren't lovable. But I digress. The individual who sent me this email was up in arms about the whole thing and I just had to reply with the following (names have been changed to protect the innocent or guilty depending on your perspective):

Dear Family member who shall remain nameless:

When you send this around, it makes me think that you are supporting what this guy says. Are you? If so, I suppose that is your business. If not, don't be surprised if other family members get very irked with you. I'm not mad, but curious. You know I'm not terribly into Jeebs (aka Jesus) and all the crap that goes along with organized religion. I would probably really enjoy a film depicting Jesus and his disciples as homos. Who doesn't dig on guy love? You know I love love LOVE sacrilege. Perhaps you are letting me know that a really excellent film is coming out...??? I love you and hope you are well!


Needless to say, there were a few exchanges via email, but I finally convinced this person (whom I actually do care a great deal for) to cease and desist such nonsense with the following, final email regarding this matter:

Your email didn't ruin my day, I just saw it as an opportunity to utilize that example to highlight how it could be taken in a negative way by others. I do think that people have the right to believe what they want. I don't believe that everyone has to be preached to about it, you know? I think that, if you are feeling particularly religious, you should share that stuff with your Jesus-lover friends and not those who aren't really on board. It would be more gratifying for you and less annoying to others. I certainly wasn't angry...just rolling my eyes, which happens a lot as you know!


I am happy to report that it seems to be the end of the harassment. And, more importantly, my relationship with the offending party remains intact.

Long time, no blog...

In case anyone is still reading this, I thought I better pop by and post a little sum'n sum'n. I am totally embarrassed that my last post was 4 months ago or so. Pathetic. I apologize. Life's been crazy. I got a job! A really great job and I am thoroughly enjoying it. It does require a commute, however, as I am continuing to reside in the same place I've been for the past several years now (therefore, truthfully, the job itself does not require a commute, but I, insanely, am opting to commute so that I may continue to live where I do). Thus, I anticipate the continuous presence of something driving-related on my "hate" list.

So, speaking of residing in the same place I have been for several years...I recently had an epiphany that has left me semi-depressed (well, the epiphany coupled with student loan repayment notices arriving daily in the mail for the past week). After grad school, I didn't feel the motivation I used to feel about things I love doing, such as biking and running. I initially chalked it up to something fundamental shifting within me during the whole grad school extravaganza. However, I recently caught myself in a daydream about riding a trail back home and realized that I haven't lost the motivation to ride, I just don't want to ride here. Woe is me! That little gem sent me into a bit of a downward spiral for several weeks. Here's what's happened in the meantime...
1) I've decided to make every effort to get back home (this entails finding and obtaining gainful employment, which is actually harder than it sounds in the land of sun and fun)! In the meantime, fall has arrived here and with it the usual perfect riding weather and amazing transformation of colors. It is my favorite time of year to be here, which makes staying here much more bearable.
2) I've joined a group of women that do group rides each week and have discovered two other groups that I'd like to join for weekly rides as well (Yippeee! As most of you know, one of my primary problems with riding here [aside from the relative monotony of trail conditions - meaning smooth, totally ridable singletrack -yawn] is my fear of bears. For those of you who don't know, I have seen bears on a majority of my bike rides here - both on and off road endeavors have elicited such undesirable results. For a desert-dweller, bear-sightings incite a particular brand of fear that renders one almost completely incapacitated. So, group riding = no bear sightings = less fear associated with riding = more riding!
3) I've gotten incredibly ill...twice. I had anticipated that working in a school would increase my exposure to common colds and flu viruses, but I had not anticipated getting sick in such rapid succession. The most recent cold (the one with which I now suffer) is particularly nefarious and was actually compliments of my significant other. Between this and his new found love of spreading his schoolwork throughout the house (on any available surface), he is really clawing his way to the top of my shit list.
4) I've had a birthday! Thanks to those of you who remembered. I was actually sick at the time (we should start a tally on how many times this theme will recur on future posts) and can only hope that illness is excuse enough for not acknowledging your birthday wishes. Especially because it meant a lot to me. It wasn't the best birthday ever as my little residence epiphany occurred right around that time. Thankfully, things have improved drastically since then.

I think that is about it. I am hereby vowing to post at least once per month from here on out. I actually hope to do so more frequently, but I like to set myself up to succeed (which translates into: I like to set the bar low, so I can clear it)!

Blah

Today I am bored. Bored enough even to post a new entry on the blog. It's a sad state of affairs, I admit. Imagine my desperation for something to do if my best option is this! I graduated over the weekend and have STILL not found a job (devotees will remember that I have been searching for some time - reference posting #1, "Look at me!"). The most recent excitement was receiving a letter in the mail from a particular agency (who will remain nameless) informing me that I could not be considered for the position for which I had applied because I did not have a master's degree. The irony is, I got the letter on Saturday (the day I graduated...with my master's degree). The whole process just makes me take a step back and marvel at the wondrous and, I'm sure this goes without saying, EFFICIENT hiring process in which the federal, state, and county governments are currently engaged. I know I thoroughly enjoy it myself. Hard not to, frankly.

Hmmmmm...while I was desperately trying to grasp around at the remains of creativity and intelligence lurking in the deep, dark shadows of my brain, I decided to write the label for this post. Apparently, I turned on a special feature and am now totally unable to turn it off. Well, for your information, the jibberish (how's that for cultural competence?) below says, "blah blah blah." I know - clever.

Well, back to my riveting life. To be honest, I'm procrastinating a run. The weather is horrible and I can hardly bring myself to do it. Motivating to run on a sunny, beautiful day is challenging.

Thanks for stopping by. The fact that you have tells me that you must be as bored as I am, and it comforts me!